Money Is a Skill
And Skills Require Practice
I recently went to the gym with my brother-in-law.
Important context: he’s a fitness instructor. He goes every day. He knows the machines by name. He belongs there.
I said yes because I assumed we’d do what most reasonable adults do when they go to the gym together: walk in, nod at each other, then immediately split up and do our own thing.
Instead, we walk in, and he turns to me and says,
“Alright. What do you want to work on?”
And I realized…
oh no.
He wants to work out together.
It was exciting and anxiety-inducing at the same time. Like one of those dreams where you realize you can fly, but you’re also very aware that gravity still exists.
I have weights at home. I’m not new to moving my body. But this felt different. This was vocabulary. Structure. Decisions.
He starts listing options.
“Cardio. Weight training. Circuits.”
I recognized all of the words individually. I had no idea what any of them meant for me.
I didn’t want to sound clueless. I also didn’t want to pretend I knew what I was doing. So I said the most honest thing I could manage:
“Why don’t you just set the course, and I’ll do whatever you do.”
That’s when it hit me.
This is exactly how people feel when they ask for money advice.
The Beginner’s Problem
When you’re new to something, the problem isn’t that you don’t have answers.
It’s that you don’t yet know which questions you’re allowed to answer.
Experts ask:
What are your goals?
When do you want to retire?
What are you optimizing for?
Reasonable questions.
But if you’re new, they feel like a vocabulary test. A subtle reminder that you don’t speak the language yet.
I’ve gone back to the gym with him a few more times since.
Two things became clear.
First, he looks exactly like someone you’d expect to be good at this. Built. Trained boxer. Can lift heavy things and punch a hanging bag in a way that makes it look like the bag owes him money.
Second, I was using about half the weight he was.
Which is humbling in a very specific way.
Not “I should leave” humbling.
More like, “Oh. This is where I actually am.”
And that realization wasn’t discouraging.
It was orienting.
What Practice Actually Did
What surprised me wasn’t that I was behind.
It was that after a few sessions, I wasn’t guessing anymore.
I started recognizing machines.
I understood what muscles were supposed to feel tired.
I stopped apologizing when I asked questions.
And without really planning to, my workouts at home changed.
I didn’t suddenly become disciplined.
I just had more options.
A broader repertoire of movements I could reach for when I showed up.
Practice didn’t transform me overnight.
It expanded what was available to me.
That’s a different kind of progress.
The Myth of One Conversation
Here’s what people underestimate.
You don’t go to the gym once and become healthy.
You don’t practice guitar twice and become a musician.
No one walks up to a music teacher and says, “Can you just make me a musician?”
They understand that it takes repetition. Time spent sounding a little clumsy. A willingness to not be good yet.
And yet with money, many people expect something different.
They assume one good conversation with someone who “knows finance” will fix it.
“Just tell me the four things.”
That’s not how bodies work.
That’s not how music works.
And it’s not how money works either.
Money is a skill.
And skills require practice.
Values Decide What Gets Practiced
If you value being physically healthy, you practice movement.
If you value getting better at music, you practice playing.
If you value your time — and want more say over how you spend it, who you spend it with, and when you stop trading it for income — then you practice money.
Not because you love spreadsheets.
Because you love what money makes possible.
Paying attention to what you earn and what you spend helps.
Creating a gap between the two helps, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Investing consistently helps.
Learning the language slowly helps.
Having people or a community around you who’ve walked the path helps.
Not because any one action changes your life.
But because repetition changes what you’re capable of over time.
A Place to Start
If you’re new, don’t start with retirement projections.
Start with orientation.
Ask yourself one honest question:
Where does money feel heavy right now?
What would relief actually look like?
What does “enough” mean in this season, not some future one?
What’s one dial you could adjust this year?
Who are you learning alongside?
You don’t have to answer all of them.
Just pick one that lands.
Not a master plan.
Just a place to start.
This Isn’t for Experts
Practicing an instrument isn’t just for virtuosos.
Going to the gym isn’t just for professional athletes.
And learning how money works isn’t just for finance people.
These practices exist so regular people can get better at the things they say they want more of.
They don’t turn you into someone new overnight.
They simply expand what’s available to you.
Not all at once.
Not perfectly.
Just by showing up again.
Cadence of Cash
Time is your most valuable resource. Money is just the practice that protects it.